Fun twist on the left-leaning political perspective.
Sarah Huckabee Sanders will be lying for money on FOX. The Trump Administration wants to detain migrant families indefinitely and Faux News defended this stance ridiculously. CNN reported G7 leaders dread dealing with Cheeto. Washington state Governor Jay Inslee called off his campaign for president, and will run for governor again. Also-former presidential candidate John Hickenlooper announced he’s running for Senate. Russia sent a “humanoid” into space to aid cosmonauts.
Trump canceled a Denmark trip because they won’t sell Greenland. However, the real reason could be that Shitler doesn’t want to be upstaged by Obama’s visit later in the month to the Danish country. We learned from Cheeto he is, in fact, the “Chosen One” and the “Second Coming.” Former mouthpiece to the fascist White House, Sean Spicer announced he’s going to be on “Dancing With the Stars.” A whistleblower from the IRS called out Shitler for shenanigans surrounding a presidential and vice-presidential audit.
Trump called Jewish Democrats disloyal, or — at best — really dumb. The Crabs reviewed results from the Iowa corn kernel poll, and it’s a tossup between Democrats and the GOP. The fourth highest Dem in the House signaled an impeachment inquiry should pop off in the very near future. Dynamo candidate Elizabeth Warren sold out a town hall in Minnesota.
The NYPD fired Eric Garner’s killer cop who choked to death the man despite Garner’s repeated plea of, “I can’t breathe!” Neo-Nazis are setting up training camps with live firing drills but limp, feckless racist law enforcement in Murica won’t do dick to stop it. Democratic candidate Julian Castro pledged to beef up protections for animals if elected. The fascist in the oval proposed tossing bread crumbs at the peasants in the form of a break in payroll taxes. Plague-ridden prairie dogs in Colorado are being inoculated via drone.
Is it irony that Trump fat-shamed a protester at his latest Nuremberg rally in New Hampshire? Bernie Sanders suggests Israel give back billions of dollars in U.S. aid, since they have started banning our congress members from visiting. A leaked draft White House executive order shows Shitler wants to be able to censor social media. Greenland is not for sale, though Trump seems very interested.
Israel banned Representatives Omar and Tlaib at the behest of racist Trump. Even AIPAC pushed back against Israel’s decision to ban the legislators. Senator Elizabeth Warren jumped out to a big lead in an Iowa Caucus poll.
Steve King’s rape and incest comments earned the Nazi legislator a profane shaming from hosts of CrabDiving. Trump knows dick about the yield curve and surely we are headed for a nasty recession. The guards of Jeffrey Epstein were napping when the now dead-ass pedophile took his worthless life.
Ken Cucinelli’s Statue of Liberty poem rewrite would have been surreal under any other administration. Trump spewed forth a bunch of unhinged statements in a 10-minute tarmac rant. Riot police stormed the Hong Kong airport causing loads of flight cancellations. CNN’s Chris Cuomo was filmed threatening a heckler and likening the term “Fredo” to the n-word.
Trump loosened endangered species protection because Cheeto only cares for himself, Happy Meals and Ivankar, in that order. The late child rapist Jeffrey Epstein kept diaries of all the evil famous people who boarded his private jet, Lolita Express. Trump-sucker Billy Barr said there were serious irregularities with the jail that held Epstein. Anti-gay troll Bryan Fischer used the Boy Scouts’ child sexual abuse scandal to bash our LGBTQ brothers and sisters.
Massive gun seller Walmart removes violent video games promos but leaves the personal weapons of mass destruction aisles well enough alone. Biden uttered some dumb racist crap. Supposedly, the number of presidential candidates to chose from are tiring Iowa voters. FOX News Nazi twunt Tucker Carlson started a vacation right after suggesting white supremacy was a hoax. Gwyneth Paltrow’s vaginal steaming technique caused major burns upon a woman’s inside fun-parts.